I usually dont do this.....

Lately I have been reading a lot of different blogs and there were two that really caught my eye and have been good reading. This one and this one. The Southern Lovin blog is written by a young lady named Peach aka Tiffany. I found her blog via Crunk and Disorderly(I love that blog!) and on the particular day I was reading I caught myself missing Ron Mexico a little bit. Not one to give the devil any glory(I was not going back to my previously depressed state), I tried to focus my attention on something else. The first thing I saw on her page was The Detroit Chronicles. The name alone intrigued me. I began reading and I hung on to every word wondering if she would ever get away and what ever happened with the colorful cast of characters that floated in and out of the story. I had to remind myself I was reading a part of someones real life. I could identify with her because Ron Mexico was the king of all things verbally abusive. If he sensed for one second I was getting "ahead of myself" he would have the right words to cut me down. Reading her story reminded me there was nothing good about him and my life is SOOOOO much better now than it was when I was with him. I say all of this because, the author of that blog needs help finding her son's father. Anyone who knows me, knows I am a fierce advocate for all the Baby Mama's out there. I don't think it's fair that men get to shirk their responsibilities and we get stuck trying to parent a child we created with someone else. Not fair. She created a blog with his info so she can get in contact with him. Spread it 'round people.
All has been quiet on the western front. The place where I am having my reception is being rude as hell. I see the bridezilla hat needs to donned. I will be calling her back next week when I am off. This weekend Rev and I are going to spend a romatical(lol) weekend in Williamsburg. I can't say all we are going to do here because it's supposed to be a surprise for his birthday. I will be bringing the camera and I will have some pictures! I have so much to do tonight. I need to wash clothes. I am so lazy in that department. I think the problem is I have a lot of clothes so I can let that basket just overflow because I am not in need for clean clothes. I found a site for black brides. Yippee! I love The Knot and all, but I needed a more "ethnic"(as they would say on The Knot) approach to wedding planning.
Next weekend will be my baby's first overnight trip with her dad. Why did I agree? God told me to. Usually, I make up some kind of excuse, but I am just tired. I put all of my fears in God's hands. God won't let anything bad happen to her. Before she goes I am going to pray over her and have her step daddy to be anoint her. I ain't playing. Then I will need someone to pray over me all night because I will be missing my baby. I told Rev Saturday I will just sit in the house and cry all day. Sunday I'm trying to go to church all day until she comes home. Revival anyone? Just keep me in your prayers. Be Blessed!

Short n' Sexy.....

Today I rocked the TWA at work. I won't even front, I was nervous as hell. Not everyone is progressive when it comes to natural hair or short hair. I was not so nervous about the short part (I had a short cut from 95 to 00) but more so the natural part. You know everyone was going to have a million and one questions. Anyone who knows me knows I don't like answering a bunch of questions. I must say.....I look fly as hell today. I am wearing my khaki and pink suit, tortoise shell glasses and cream colored espadrilles. Fly indeed. My hair routine this morning was outta control. It took me all of two minutes, if that. I sprayed my hair with Elasta QP H Two and followed up with Care Free Curl Gold. It defined my curl pattern pretty good. The easy maintainace is enough to keep my hair natural.
Not much went down this weekend. On Friday night Rev and I packed up the kids and we went to Wally World to work on our wedding registry. I had to give Rev some lessons in quality bath towels. I hate to sound bougie but, I don't want to use them rough 2 dollar bath towels. He could not seems to understand why I was in love with the 5 dollar bath towel. Duh, because it was much softer. I told him to make sure to use his 2 dollar towels when we get married. On Saturday I returned to The Look and got my new TWA trimmed up. Keep in mind I did my own hair cut the first time, and I ended looking like......mmmm.....you know when a crackhead has not been taking care of themselves and their hair just kinda grows willy nilly? That is what I had going on. It just looked bad all the way around. That is why I did not post any BC pictures right away. No mam you all won't call my new look a hot mess. The weather was heavenly on Saturday. I felt totally liberated when I left the salon. Saddiqa hooked me up lovely. She also charged me like 35 dollars to do it since she washed it to....um no...I was not feeling that part. My work day is almost over and for that I am happy. I hate to sound golddiggerish, but I hope my ch-sup comes tomorrow...I have some things I need to take care of. Shouts out to all my Secretaries! This is our week......Be Blessed!!

The Big Chop!!!

After careful consideration and months of anticipation...............

I DID THE BIG CHOP!!!!!!

For those not familiar with hair terminology, the Big Chop is when you are growing out your relaxer and you cut everything off except the new growth so you can start fresh. I originally wanted to transition to natural hair with out cutting anything off. Yesterday, I sat in my office and asked myself why I was holding on to hair that would have to be chopped off anyway. I thought of my hair as a security blanket. I have had short hair before and every time I grow it out, the new long hair has a history to it. I won't get into the history of this hair, but it has had some special moments. This is the hair that was with me when my thyroid was acting up, the hair that blew in the wind when I was standing in front of the Barnes and Nobles in Va Beach, waiting on a chronically late Ron Mexico. This is the hair that I went on my first date with Rev in. All of the good and bad times of the last 2 years were in my hair. I sang a song last Sunday about walking into a new season in your life, and this is the beginning of a new season for me. Things in my life are changing and why shouldn't my hair? I felt liberation from a lot of the bad memories in my life as I took those scissors to my head. This wasn't just about getting down to my natural hair, this was about getting down to the natural me. When I was finished, I looked in the mirror, and I saw this new woman. My face looked brighter, happier. I felt like I was really looking at myself for the first time. I slapped on some of my fieriest hoop earrings and rocked that look like nobodies business. I am glad I did it. I am going to get my lil TWA shaped up so I can give up my half wig(some things are hard to let go of....lol).

Last night Rev came over(I am not sure how he feel about my new look.....he likes long hair) and we watched the atrocity which is called "I Love New York". That show is the reason we will never get ahead. My IQ dropped 100 points by watching that. That whole show is a collective evil side eye and eye roll. I will not go through the shenanigans here, but let's just say it is one of the most ignorant things on TV. I wish VH1 would stop running it. Shoot, stop running re-runs. That embarrassment of a show is over and for that my soul is happy. Be Blessed !

Happy Anniversary Blog!!!! (Belated)

Yesterday, I planned to REALLY slack off at work and devote a mass amount of time to my blog 1 year anniversary. But as the saying goes, "If you want to make God laugh, make plans." I had a little inclination on Monday morning that something was not right with Miss Beasley. She woke up at 5am(the time I normally wake up) and she seemed extra whiny(something I hate). She said she didn't feel well, but I know my child.....she is dramatic......like her mama! I just kept on getting her ready and strangely, she was knocked out asleep before we hit the end of the street. I got a call later on that day at work. It was Miss Silla, telling me to come pick Gabby up from the daycare, she has a fever of 102.00. That was all I needed to hear. I got my ass in gear. But let me sidebar here and let you all know that I learned an important lesson about procrastination. I waited ALL day to do my billing as it only takes me 30 minutes and it was going to cut into my morning "chill time". Do you know I had to finish that before I could pick my baby up because I knew I would not be there the next day and I did not want some HUGE uproar about how I am not doing my work. Hell, they already think I am lazy. So I entered in the billing all willy nilly(forgetting the nursing department) and got the heck out of Dodge. As I drove I felt guilty as hell that I didn't listen to her that morning. You never realize how much you love your kids until they get really sick. When I got to the daycare, Miss Beasley was shivering and they had her in blankets. I picked her up and held her in my arms. Her spirit did not even feel like it's self. Her crazy ass daddy was there(Lord, help me) tomabout, "They don't have my updated information" Negro, please. It is not my responsibility to update your information anymore. A parent would make sure that the daycare had their numbers if they change cell phones, or jobs, or say...move to Atlanta. I digress, we took Miss Beasley to the doctors office(thank God for after-hours appointments). After some poking and prodding and testing of my baby we find out she has strep throat. Gross. I know who the culprit was. My sister, bringing all them GA germs up here. She was sucking back Theraflu while she was here. Uh huh.... I am happy to report Miss Beasley is feeling 100 percent better. Yesterday we did nothing by sit at home and chill. Rev came by that night and we watched Charlotte's Web (for the fifty eleventh time) and later on, Jungle Fever(you know a sister had to buy that one for the collection!). I redid Miss Beasley's two strand twist, and I must say they were looking fly. I cannot wait until I grow the rest of this Chemical Fire Cream(CFC) out of my hair. I think that will be my signature style.
One year ago, I started this blog as an extension of my ramblings on MySpace. I have a passion for writing. If I could make it a productive career, I totally would, but I need to know where my next paycheck is coming from. When I look back from the beginning to now, I see a couple of things: 1)How far I have progressed in my Christianity 2)How scantily I used to post. Since getting back on the blog bandwagon, I this blog has served as a release. It is hard being the fiancee of a Minister, and one of the things I wanted to accomplish on this blog was to break the stereotype of the "First Lady". I am not a Stepford Wife to my Fiance. I am coming to realize that I may never be like those other wives. I still like to bump my slow jams in my car as I speed down the highway. I think 300 dollars is outrageous for a suit. I recently dropped out of the "If I am not there when he preaches, the world will come to an end" club. I am finally finding my way in "this life". Keep reading....the best is yet to come! Be Blessed!

The Reason We Can't Get Ahead.....

On Saturday, I was that reason. I went to Dillard's with Miss Beasley before we headed off to my friend Birdie's baby shower. I was using the gift card I bought a long time ago for some ungrateful individual(too long a trifling to even get into) and I decided as the final nail in my coffin of memory of this person, I spent that sucker! My Clinique exfoliating lotion ran out and my skin was starting to look the fool. So, I enter the store on the phone with Boogie and carrying Miss Beasley on my hip and talking loud as hell. I was going on, and on about me and Rev's meeting with the wedding photographer (more on that) and how Rev as acting stank(more on that too!). Mind you, I did not realize that until I got home that night and I was washing my face with my new Clinique. I believe I probably set black folks back about 5 years. I had the nerve to wonder why the Clinique lady was looking at me crazy when she rung me up. *sigh*
Rev and I went to visit our wedding photographer on Saturday morning. When I first spoke to the man about meeting with him he informed us he was working out of his home. My first thought was, "Oh no....not another bootleg operation". But it was anything but. He was extremely profession and his office was a haven of all the latest equipment and beautiful wedding photos. I was really impressed with the DVD presentation and his no deposit policy(we don't have 650 dollars at this moment) and his overall professionalism. So this whole time I am visibly excited and Rev is sitting over there looking darn near retarded. So we get in the car and this fool is like, "I'll think about it". I could have slapped the tar out of him right then and there. Before I say what I need to say, Rev is cheap as hell. That has at times proven to be a good thing in our relationship because I spend money like it's water. To me higher prices=better product. Not always true, but it's a philosophy that works for me. You get what you pay for. When we first started looking for photographers, true I was a lil bougie and started picking these 2,000 and 3,000 dollar photographers. Rev had to put me in check and I went on the stalk looking for something acceptable. I soon realized that the prices I envisioned were too much and I had not considered the videography. So I happened to be loafing off at work as I do, and I found Visions Photography. 900 dollars for 8 hours of photography, my bridal shoot included and for an extra 400 dollars he will videotape the ceremony and reception and it will be on DVD. Total 1,300 dollars. Can't beat that with a bat. Rev is looking at me like the figure is too high. So, I had to put my Bridezilla hat on and give him the business in the car. After 3 hours I called him back and all was well. Mens is like chiren....you gotta let them know who has the upper hand. LOL! I'm playing, but he did come around to my way of thinking after giving him some figures. Anyone who is afraid we will go over budget need not be afraid. Rev is not going to let that happen at all.
Sunday I sang Seasons.....and the Lord really used me. Satan tried to stop me from singing my song all morning long. But I just prayed and asked Him for His will to be done. Just let the song come out the way He wanted it to. It went well. I am happy I did not give the devil any glory and back out of singing it.
I think my time at Sentara may be drawing to a close. I am going to have to have some serious private time with the Lord tonight and let Him speak to me about it. I am applying for three different positions with the city of Norfolk. I need higher pay. I may not have a degree but I have lots of knowledge and I think I have focused on the mediocre positions because I felt like that is all I can get. But my Pastor preached a sermon yesterday "Who do you Depend On?" I depend on God to get things done for me. If there is something that the Lord wants me to do, there is nothing anyone can do to stop it from happening. So if one of those jobs is for me then it's going to go down. I take my typing test tomorrow, wish me luck. Be Blessed!

Hooray it's Friday!!!!!!

I am so bored sitting up here at work today. I am just happy it is Friday. Tonight is the church conference. You all know I am going to have some stories to tell. I am only going because the church is supposed to be voting on our new musician. After that gets done I am leaving because I have to do my weekly hair stuff(Aphogee tonight......so messy!) and I have to get up early tomorrow morning because Rev and I are going to meet with our wedding photographer. God has a sense of humor. Why does the photographer live right down the street from Rev's estranged Dad? I told him he should just show up. You know I like to be nosy. I want to know what his reasons are....but then again that's not my business.
In my department I usually work in the medical records office by myself. It's cool back there, I just hook up my little mp3 player and work away(read: play on the 'net all day). Due to my co-worker taking a lil vay-cay, I have been working the front desk all this week. Let me just be the first to say that I will be happy when Monday comes. I hate sitting up at this desk on display like a bear at the zoo. I am also not fond of people asking me a who bunch of stupid questions(yes, there is such a thing as stupid questions). I learned something this week though. Some people drink coffee ALL DAY. First let me start off by saying I am not a coffee drinker so maybe I can't understand. A patient comes to me at 2 o'clock in the afternoon asking me to make a new pot of coffee. Um no. It's 2 o'clock! You don't need coffee. Coffee is a breakfast drink. She had the nerve to look all offended because I wouldn't. I would not go to Burger King at 2 o'clock and ask for a sausage egg biscuit. IT'S 2 O'CLOCK!!!!! If you need caffeine go to the cafeteria and get a Coke.
I talked to my sister for a long time yesterday. It was very refreshing. I am so happy that we can finally have a conversation where someones feelings are not hurt afterwards. During our conversation she delivered to me a little bad news. One of our cousins on our mother's side has full blown AIDS. Yes, AIDS. That is really sad. I have only met him once in my life, but nonetheless, it's sad. My mom called my sister asking what he could do and of course in true Boogie fashion, "Nothing". I can't fault her for that. Two things could have saved this man's life. A condom and HIV testing. I say HIV testing because if he would have known a little sooner, the doctor could have given him drugs to help prolong his life. Now, unfortunately it's too late. He found out about his status because he got really sick and had to go into the hospital. He's a young man so I am sure they were in shock at how fast his condition deteriorated. My prayers are with him.
As I was typing this another reason why I dislike working at this desk occurred. The therapists are running about 30 minutes behind and this patient is all in my face wondering what the hold up is because they didn't bother to come out and let the patient know. Whaddayagonnado? I can't make them come out and get you. I can barely get them hoes to turn their billing in correctly. I hope this day doesn't start going down hill... Be Blessed!

Choir 'Hersal, Seasons, and Racisim.....

Last night was choir rehearsal. Our musician is not going to be there Sunday, so Rev was so kind to step in. That was good for him. I am clearly convinced that Rev is going to heaven because he does a heap of nice shizz that I just don't do. Before Rev got there, Nevada and Miss T decided that I should sing "Seasons" by Donald Lawrence and the Tri City singers. I was hyped. I had been asking Rev all the live long day while he was our musician if I could sing it again because if I do say so myself, I walked it down. So Rev got there and we got started and when sang a few songs(our choir was NOT cut out for Uncle Donnie's "Church Medley"), it was time for me to sing. All hell began to break loose. First of all, I am not really a powerful singer in public. At home? I am loud and proud. At rehearsal? I am just trying to blend in with the group. So of course the first complaint around was they could not hear me and I needed a mic. This wasn't discovered until verse 2 and during verse 1 Ronald and John were openly discussing getting a mic, while. I . was. singing. While they were carrying on their personal debate, the sopranos were just half-singing, I heard no altos and about two tenors ( I will excuse Deacon because he had been driving all day so I know he was tired). I have never felt so insignificant and unimportant. So we get the mic and then I start singing the beginning of the vamp in like 5 different keys. One of those keys was "P" for pitiful. I don't know what happened! I sang the song perfectly months ago and now it just sounds horrible. I have just resigned to my self that I will just get up there and do my best.
I am so hungry sitting up here at work right now. I am trying to stay on the straight and narrow since buying my wedding dress but it's almost that time of the month and a sister is hon-gray! At least I have given up the swine in the morning. I think that will be a great help to my diet. I don't really want to get as skinny as I was last summer (129 lbs....all my hips were gone!). A nice 135-140 is fine. In time it will come, and I will GLADLY walk into that season...lol.
I know you all heard about that fool Don Imus talking about "nappy headed ho's" *sigh*. My heart goes out to those girls. They had a "crash" moment in front of the whole world. I was hurt because I have a daughter and I would have been madder than mad if someone made a comment about her and they don't even know anything about her. This should serve as an example to all black folks that racism is still alive and well in this country. I can't help but to feel as I walk through the hallways of the hospital if white folks are calling me a "nappy headed ho" in their mind. Probably. I know I am going to catch some shit for this, sometimes these days we bring the racist public opinion on ourselves. Flavor of Love? Pure coonery. I Love New York? Pure coonery. Just look at some of the music videos out today. I have stopped watching Rap City(a show that used to be my FAVORITE) and 106 and Park because it has turned into what was depicted in the Boondocks series. Bootybuttcheeks all day long. I have said it once and I will say it again, Black folks everywhere, we need to do better. For those of use still acting the fool, see how it is bringing down the accomplishments of Black people trying to bring some pride to our race. For every step we make forward into progress we seem to take two steps back. Just do better my people.....just do better. Be Blessed!

I GOT IT!!!!!!

This weekend was very productive. This weekend I scheduled a meeting with my "Bridal Brigade" so we could get the bridal attire popping on a handstand. First of all let me say this: I want to publicly thank the three bridesmaids that showed up. Two of them got lost(?) and one did not show up(not cool). When we got there, David's Bridal was packed as all get out. I forgot that it was also prom season and all the Lil high schoolers were there trying on dresses. When I got there, Birdie, and Weezy were already there. I was greeted by my consultant. *sigh* When I imagined my bridal consultant, I imagined a fashionista who would be fashion forward individual with great hair and make up, etc. Well what I got was Rebbecca with this short spiky hair cut and this Christmas like sweater. She needed more training in her job. I told her to bring all of the dresses on my list. This broad came back with two dresses at a time like she was rationing them out, then she kept claiming she could not find the dresses that I wanted in my size. Bull. After trying out only 4 dresses out of 16, I sent my mom and sister to take to the floor to find the rest of the dresses on my list. Guess what? They came back with about 5 dresses on the list. *sigh* Good help is so hard to find. Well, ultimately I ended up picking out a GORGEOUS dress. I can't really describe it because I know a certain someone reads this blog and he will figure it out. Yes, THE DRESS has finally been purchased, and I am glad I did when I did because it is not scheduled to be here until June 30Th. Could you imagine what kind of drama and calamity would have ensued if I ordered that thing in October? The dress still needs to be altered too? Fuggitaboutit! Of course en route to Davids Bridal, Mama took a wrong turn and of course she went apeshit, but I am not giving anymore space on my blog about her rants. She needs medication.
Easter was fun. Weezy came to church with her and my pastor preached is typical sermon. Not too much to report just happy I finally got my dress(and could afford it!) Be Blessed!

You Can't Do That in the House of the Lord.....or so they say...

This weekend was just drama and action packed....sweet Jesus.
Let me first start with the choir conspiracy of 2007. I was talking to Rev and I was just wondering out loud what was going to happen to rehearsal since our musician cancelled rehersal on Tuesday and we had to sing that Sunday and we had a Pastoral Installation service to sing for(oh there is a story there just wait for it..). Well Rev, who I might add doesn't even attend my church, tells me, "Y'all are having rehearsal on Saturday at 12." WTF?!?!?!? How does he know and I don't? Well, Miss T from our choir director(and his home girl) told him, I guess to tell me. I went slam off. When in the hell was Nevada going to call and tell me? Mind you, Rev knew on Wednesday and the day was Thursday. I waited, I waited, I waited on that phone call and it never came. I just showed my ass up on Saturday like, "Yeeeeahhhh thought y'all were gonna oust me!" But in a side note, Miss Luann and First Lady Sr.(I would like to think of myself as First Lady Jr.) had not heard about it either. It turns out Nevada was in charge of calling everyone and suspiciously EVERYONE'S answering machine or voicemail was malfunctioning that day, because no one got a message *side eye*. Once all that was straightened out, we got down into rehearsal. We had the type of rehearsal that I have been praying to God for since I joined the choir. It is my belief that you cannot learn a song and sing it with precision in 30 minutes. Some people can, but the majority cannot. We started at 1230(Black people, we must do better) and ended at 230pm. And you know what? We sounded cute, fabulous and wonderful on Sunday. There were some rough spots, but we sang with enthusiasm and confidence.
Later that night was the comedy show at the church. Oh you heard me right, a comedy show with Cortney Gee. I can tell you right now, that I have seen Cortney Gee on Comic View and I knew that this was not going to be a good look. Where I live most people haven't even to Virginia(real talk). They talk about Virginia like it's 5 hour away. It's only 45 minutes to and hour. The show started off OK, then the jokes about trying to be celibate and masturbation as relief(ain't nothing wrong with some getting to know 'me' time....your hand or jackrabbit can't get you pregnant or give you herpes), so on and so forth. He must have forgotten he was a) In a church b) In a room with a majority of older women. Needless to say, there weren't a lot of rave reviews on Sunday morning. That will probably be the last time we get to do anything 'non-traditional' at church. Grand opening, grand closing.
As I mentioned before, Sunday the choir traveled to Windsor, NC to witness one of our former associate ministers installation service as Pastor to a church. The whole plan all month long was for Mama and I to ride together. If you reference my previous blog when we went to see Tramaine Hawkins, I should have politely said no and rode with Rev. I thought this time I couldn't fail because I was not going to use GPS, just straight up Map Quest. I printed them up the night before and I made sure that she saw me put them in the glove compartment, lest I forget them and be accused of ruining her whole day on purpose. We leave the church, and go to Hardee's. In Hardee's she accuses me of rushing her and in the car she starts all this foolishness about Rev having a wife on the side(don't project your real life on me lady!). So in all this tirade, she misses the turn(she wasn't listening or paying attention). I tell her she's going the wrong way, this bitch straight up bust a U-way in the middle of the street. Then she hits the gas and goes from 0-50 in a matter of seconds almost hitting the Yukon in front of us. I told her to let my ass out right now, if she was going to act like that. I have my child in the car and we are not going to meet our deaths over a dumb ass wrong right turn. Her and my Daddy may be into acting crazy like that with each other, but I am not for the bull. So she tells me to get myself and my muthaflucking baby out of her car *gasp, shock, horror*. She continues what I like to call the "crazy mode" until I tell her just drop me off at the upcoming Wal-mart and I will call Rev(what I should have done all along) and have him come get me and Miss Beasley. So she swings in to the Wally World parking lot and deposits me and my child in the parking lot, car seat and all. Crazy Bus, pulls off and it's just Miss Beasley(who is looking so confused) and myself standing in an empty parking lot. As God as my witness Mama and I will ALWAYS,ALWAYS,ALWAYS, drive separate cars. Twice was enough for me. Rev picked me and Miss Beasley up and we got to the service in about an hour.

The service was nice, they seem to love Rev. Riverside. For the first time in the history of us dating, Rev was not on the organ. They asked, oh you know they asked but he declined(now if he can get some back bone when it comes to Pastor Say-anything-out-my-mouth, he'd be alright...). My Pastor preached the service and in the middle of all the hoopin' and hollering (I finally know what the phrase is all about), I realized that my Pastor doesn't teach the text or tie it in with daily living. He just gathers a bunch of 'preacher catch phrases' and says those. Some of his hits include:

• "For God I live and for God I die"
• "Be not dismayed whatever be tried...God will take care of you..( will admit I fell out a couple of times on that one)
• "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy...I said...joy comes in the morning. Anybody ever cried all night, pillow wet with tears?"
• "I have two angels that travel with me all the days of my life....Goodness.....and.....Mercy"

There are more, but I realized all of this sermons contain about two paragraphs full of those. Jesus wept. That's why you have to be careful on who you pick as your spiritual covering. I know two other preachers, these two fools read directly from a piece of paper(got the never to have it typed up and in report folders to boot). There is nothing wrong with note cards but don't give me your Bible book report. Be Blessed!